Skip to main content

Why the seal do people not know how to use an elevator?

Am I really so basic? Elevator jokes? Really? Well yes... I am going there because people just don't learn.

An elevator call button... NOT ROCKET SCIENCE

Up and down people... that would be people who push the up and the down to summon the lift faster are just terribly awful people.

If you do this, I am sorry to be the one to tell you this but, you are both unintelligent and selfish. Think very carefully about this and use logic. The elevator is machine that is programmed to respond to inputs of either up or down. In a system with more than one car it coordinates cars based on the pushes on different floors and sends the elevators based on the programming. It cannot deduce that since you pushed the up and the down there must be a ton of people waiting and it should send the car you want faster.

Let's look at it a different way.  You are on floor 10 and you want to go down. Being an idiot you press the "up" and "down" because it is 'faster.' After 30 seconds a car comes going up, seeing a bunch of angry faces you stammer out "going down?" The people in the up car glare at you for wasting 10-30 seconds of their life because you are a moron. You never learn so you press the "up" again. 

Luck shines on you. Another "up" car appears and this one is empty! 'Seal you Adam!' You curse as the doors open and then you hop in and close them while pressing the ground floor. You just used 10-30 seconds of your life and two possible things happen next. 

Option 1 - the car goes up
Option 2 - the car resets

Both options here cost you time... at best option 2 costs you 20-60 seconds. Give yourselves a clap for being idiots the best possible option costs you time.

How does this trick you?
Simple answer. If you press both buttons and the car comes in the direction you are heading you think "I made it come faster" you didn't... it would have come just as quickly if you had only pressed the one button.

The bottom line
The fastest way to get an elevator to come to your floor and go where you want to go is to use the elevator as intended. Up and down people please use your brains.


Comments

  1. "please use your brains" : the bottom line of almost every situation

    ReplyDelete
  2. they may want to keep their brains new and first hand :|

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

ESL Writing Tips - Paragraph Structuring

I've been working on some writing materials for a course I am supposed to be teaching next week, so I thought I would get the ball rolling by making a post about basic paragraph structuring. What is a paragraph? The most basic thing to learn when tackling writing a paragraph is to understand the relationship between the components and understand the definition of a paragraph. Our end result is the paragraph but before that we must have some sentences, those sentences are made up of words, those words come from ideas, and hopefully our ideas have a theme or topic. To sum up a paragraph is a bunch of words on on topic organised into a series of sentences. Simple right?  What are the parts of a paragraph? So glad I asked because I have a picture just for this: So Informative Many learners do not pay close enough attention to the impact that a good topic sentence can have. In order to have a good topic sentence you must ensure that you have indeed made a logica...

Urbanfresh at Setia City Mall

I recently made the unfathomable trip from my home to Setia City Mall in Setia Alam Malaysia. I was, of course, in search of interesting shopping and imported food. Some background. For those of you living in Setia Alam congrats on picking a beautiful place to live; however, my condolences as you all live in the bloody boonies!  Setia City is an INCREDIBLY nice mall with a fine selection of shops and F&B outlets, but unfortunately no game stores or Chilis (TGIFridays? Really? Ugh.) I stumbled upon a grocery store that looked quite up-scale and my import sense started tingling. What a classy place with words like Urban and fresh right in the name it must be good. The pillar says "fresh food" for seal's sake so come on! They had this interesting apple display going on at the front of the store.  This is actually a cardboard tree with apples all around it. It is a neat idea... I just hope the apples didn't grow on cardboard! The fresh fruit and veg...

Free coffee

well today, as some of you malaysians may know, starbucks was giving out free drinks today between 12 and 2pm.  it was a mystery frapp with no whipped cream (for shame) with red beans or tea jelly depending how lucky(or unlucky) you were. I wasn't really bothered one way or the other because  the love of my life    my favourite barrista was there. In true, giving out free crap fashion the line had to have about 50 people in it and took the better part of 30minutes to get through.  I had once on a whim calculated how much I get paid per minute of life... let me tell you... my free frapp cost me in that equation... lucky we don' count life that way or else we would never find the joy in free coffee.